Here she is.  First day of school.

Ok, so there’s more to the story.

Clearly, she’s not five, and clearly its way past September.  She’s heading to third grade, after spending the first half of the school year homeschooling.

I was expecting this huge moment when I dropped her off at her new school.  Like, the most epic hug ever!  Fireworks!  Presents!  Confetti!  The whole works.  But instead, as I pulled up to the staff member who received her from the car line, Natalie simply got unbuckled, said goodbye and exited the vehicle.  I rolled down the window and shouted, “It’s her first day!” The lady smiled and shut the car door. And then I had to drive to make way for the next parent/kiddo drop off.

I tried to comment to her brother behind me something like, “there she goes”, but instead I busted out crying. OMG, if me ten years ago saw me this morning there would be some finger pointing and laughing.  And if I am honest, I am still chuckling a little thinking about it.

Why do we do that? Why do we cry? As if we are saying a more final goodbye than the six hours they are actually gone for? Especially in third grade, I mean it’s not even Kindergarten! Like we haven’t done this for the last four years (minimum).  I suppose for me it goes beyond the sadness that I will miss her (especially after having her with me every day for the last seven months), but it is also a huge cyclone of feelings: joy, pride, concern, hope, guilt, and longing. Is this normal? Is something wrong with me? Who would have thought that in one quick drop off moment, for a very normal occurrence such as my child’s education, that I would have such a strong reaction? Certainly not me ten years ago.

So why did Natalie start a new school this morning, and after four months of homeschooling? (No, I didn’t hate every minute of it despite my initial assumptions). Well, that’s a story for another blog post.  So keep reading!

I would love to hear your thoughts about The First Day of School drop off.

How do you prepare? Do you make a special breakfast or send a love note in their lunchbox? Do you take photos and post them all over social media? How do you feel after your kiddo leaves on that first day? I would love to know!